After a 6 month hiatus in Internet dating (not by choice), I have finally started to communicate with someone who could be quite nice.
There were the initial ‘get to know you’ type of messages and we were talking a few times a day. Then he went overseas and I fully expected that our communication would decrease. If it was me, I would have sent maybe one or two messages, but we were in relatively regular contact despite being in different hemispheres. Understandably, the messages decreased in frequency in his last few days away. That was okay, I had no problem with that.
But all of a sudden he hasn’t messaged me in three days. And I know that he has seen my last message.
This leaves me with the dilemma of double messaging. Maybe he has just been too busy to reply or maybe he quickly read my message but put off replying and then forgot. But for me, a double text or double message can come across a little bit desperate. It gives away a little of that power that we struggle for in online flirtations. You have little more than typed words when you start online dating and you have to use them to the best of your ability.
I don’t know why, but to me double texting says ‘I’ve been waiting for your message and I want more of your attention’. That is not a situation that I want to be in. So I have a policy of maximum two double texts in a close time frame. If there is significant discussion between double texts, then the counter starts again.
I know that I don’t like to give my power away, but I hate wasting my time even more. If a man can’t message me without a reminder then he isn’t worth my time.
What is your experience with return messages when internet dating?