Capacity for love

Sometimes it surprises me just how much we are able to love. We may hold out and wait for the right circumstances, but when our hearts are opened then there is infinite love to be given.

There is the love we have for our significant other. It’s not like a light switch is turned on and you realise that you love them. I imagine that you first note the small things you love about him- the way he plays with his hair, his beautiful eyes, the way he treats your family- and they continue to grow until you realise that you love everything about him. And I am constantly surprised at how much love can be given, even to those who don’t deserve it.

Then there is the love that we have for our children. The unconditional love that we have for them. There are times when they say that they hate you for some trivial reason and it breaks your heart a little, but you still give them that love. You watch as they grow older and move away from home and don’t love them any less, but from a greater distance. And when they have children, your heart swells again and you find love that you didn’t know existed.

Because love is immense and amazing. We have such capacity to love but sometimes that is abused or taken for granted. And sometimes we forget that we have the ability to love so greatly. And in moments of great sadness, we sometimes have to take away our love because it is too hurtful for ourselves. But that is the hardest part, to stop loving, because we have given so much of ourselves to that person that they keep some when we walk away. We cannot get that piece back and we can never be whole again.

The problem is that when love is gone there is only sadness left behind. Sometimes we love people who will only hurt us. But when love is done properly, when it is honest and genuine and reciprocated, then it has so much potential. I want that kind of love.

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