We all have something that we are scared of- snakes, cockroaches, being alone. Well, I happen to be afraid of a few things and occasionally it interferes with my life. And I happen to be very afraid, or have a phobia of, three things – snakes, cane toads and needles.
Now, in order to progress further in my medical career I had to partially conquer my fear of needles. I did some counselling and exposure therapy and now I can give and receive them. And I even had two needles in my mouth last weekend when I had my wisdom tooth removed with absolutely no crying.
But as my needle phobia has improved, my fear of toads has worsened. I used to be able to walk past them (with at least a 1.5m berth) with just a curl of my lip. However, now I cannot stand to look at them let alone pass by them. I just can’t.
In the last few weeks I have been faced with the evil toad twice. The first time, I came home from work at 10pm to find a toad sitting against the door to my building. I stood beside my garage (in the light) for a whole 15 minutes and contemplated what I would do. If I did manage to get the courage to open the door then the toad would just jump into the building and the situation would be worse. And I didn’t have anything to chase it away with. So I decided to get some take away and just hope that it would have moved by the time I got home. It didn’t.
I sat in my car, eating take away that I didn’t want and seriously considering just sleeping in my car for the night. But I had a new kitten at home and he needed to be fed so I just had to be brave enough. Then I remembered that there was a convenience store about 10 minutes away. For the third time that night, I pulled back into my garage with ‘incentive’ items to encourage the toad away from the door. Success. I did it.
Then yesterday I went to go shopping and was halfway down the stairs before I noticed an evil little creature at the bottom. Who the hell let the toad in? I couldn’t go out shopping then. I still had enough food to baracade myself inside for the weekend, however I had hoped that one of the many men in my building would encourage it out the door. I was wrong. So I left a note on the staircase asking someone to kindly remove it. I heard a commotion around 11pm and assumed that it was gone. But this morning I went to check and the damned creature was still there. Of all the people who went up and down the stairs last night, no one would remove it. Not even when asked nicely.
It may sound stupid to you, but I can’t help that I am scared of these things. And I had hoped that someone would have some compassion for me and help me out in my time of need. But alas, kindness is not a virtue possessed by others in my building.