I have lost count of the number of times that a random work colleague/stranger has asked me if I am seeing anyone. Half the time it is just for conversation and the other half it is about gossiping and being nosy.
The off handed, “So are you married?” question is nothing compared to the even more off handed, “Well you’re young and you’ve still got time.”
Sure, I am only 25 and that is young by nearly any means. But not when it comes to reproduction.
If I was to start dating someone tomorrow then there would be one to two years before we got engaged (if he is the right man in the first place). Then there would be one to two years until we got married then another one to two years of enjoying newly wed status before I would look at having children. That is 6 years right there. That puts me in my early 30s if I met the right man tomorrow.
After that, I can’t assume that I would fall pregnant immediately so there may be one to two years of trying to get pregnant and more if we require assistance. Then there is nine months of pregnancy and two years of looking after one child before I would want to try for another one. Again, there is the time it takes to conceive and now I’m in my late 30s. This is dangerous territory for women to fall pregnant due to the risk of congenital and genetic conditions and not to mention the danger of carrying and giving birth at this age. Only in obstetrics do we consider 40 old.
And this is all complicated by the fact that I know I have a reproductive condition that will make it harder (but not necessarily impossible) to fall pregnant.
So yes, I hear that biological clock ticking loudly. And when people say that “There’s still time” I know that they are wrong. There is time but it is limited. And with every passing year that tick becomes louder.