I’m a powerful woman, but men don’t date me | Reality Check

In college I knew a nursing student. Even before she started university, she had decided that she was going to marry a doctor and live the rich life. It was her priority and the reason that she wanted to do nursing as a career.

I lost count of the number of times she said to me, “I just want to marry a rich surgeon.” Or, “On placement today this good looking young doctor smiled at me and it just made my day.” She was a nice girl but was always motivated by her desire to marry a doctor/surgeon.

And I can honestly say that I have never met a man who was so enthusiastic about marrying a female doctor. Or a female lawyer. Or any female in a position of power, really. It doesn’t seem to be a priority of many men to marry a woman who works long hours, earns more money than them and isn’t likely to fall for the regular shit peddled to women.

As a woman in a position of power, I find that men can be quite intimidated by us. They don’t want to ask us out and prefer to aim for seemingly more attainable women, the ones that throw themselves at men. Now, I can’t speak for the men but I know powerful women and we are not scary. We don’t purposefully try to intimidate men. And a good quality, powerful woman is not interested in how much her partner earns or the status of his job. We just want to be loved.

But we also want to have something in common with our partners. And that is difficult to achieve when we have to compete with the many women who only want status and a good lifestyle. Powerful women want to have shared interests, common goals and respect. It can be disheartening when men in the same field are hunted down and strongly desired simply because they too are powerful.

Of course, it does not mean that we have to date powerful men. But then we come full circle back around to the idea of intimidation. It can be a vicious cycle that is difficult to break. In the end, all any woman wants is to be loved for who she is and not have to sacrifice part of herself to be more attainable to men.

So to all men out there – if you have integrity then you can be with any woman that you want. And if you are a mechanic and are attracted to a doctor and she rejects you, then there is a problem with her personality not her profession.


PS – One of the female doctors at work recently got engaged to a mechanic. Love comes before status.

2 thoughts on “I’m a powerful woman, but men don’t date me | Reality Check

  1. Well written! Being a woman myself, I agree to what you say. I’ve witness men not allowing their wives to make an earning, apparently because they earn and that would suffice for the family. However, power to women who prefer being independent and making a good living on their own- they usually are the ones who may become threat to a man’s ego. Thanks for the share- and a great concept indeed.


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